Cubaboy To Join Garda Reserve Force

As of August 25 of this year I will be a full member of the Garda Reserve force. I volunteered yesterday at Angelsea Garda Station and should begin my initial training at the start of July. I will be among the first wave of volunteer guards to hit the streets this year culminating in upto two hundred by the end of next year. It was really a natural progression for me, after all I've had a deep resentment for authority all my life and I will be taking this opportunity to even up a few old scores.

Bad Cops Bad Cops, Whatcha Goin A Do When They Come For You

Even though I will start out at a fairly junior level I hope to work my way up to the level of "dirty cop", taking bribes, administering beatings etc. I'd also like to take this opportunity to tell you all not to come up to me on the street and ask for directions, or the time or any other auld shite you might need help with, I won't be that kind of garda.

I conclusion I'd like to prewarn the following people that I will be settling old scores in the next year to eighteen months: JD, IH, RS, Fr F O'D, DM, Judge I MC and the entire cast of Batchelors Walk!!

Beware Tailgater's On The Mallow Road

Hot fucking, teenage pussy's, gay, lesbien, hole, Lindsay Lohan's Hole,

Disaster For Loser Gamers

Disaster today as organisers of the annual E3 fair at the hulking LA Convention Centre decided to ban hot, scantily clad chicks advertising games at the convention (click here for more). This could spell disaster for hundreds of thousands of young, ugly socially retarded men who's only contact with the oposite sex, apart from their mothers, is at these kinds of shows. One avid gamer, who I've called James D, said "This is a disaster, now I only have my hard drive of downloaded porn of sate my increasingly perverse tastes".



Hot Chicks With Snakes....I Don't Care What She's Selling But I'm Buying

These "penis fly traps" as I call them are typically scantily-clad actress-waitress-whatever employed to loiter near a booth at a trade exhibition. Upon spying or being approached by a typically young male showing advanced signs of geekdom, the babe will engage the geek in conversation, normally of a flirtatious nature. Almost immediately, the relationship will be consummated with a photograph of geek and babe entwined, before the geek hands over large amounts of money for something produced by the booth babe's employer.


Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Alba, Brad Pitt, Simpsons Sex, Theo Wallcott, England, World Cup

Dave's Dictogram

Once in a generation we are priviliged to witness the work of a great artist. The 1920's had Picasso, the renaisance had Da Vinci and now we have Dave. The following dictogram is more than just a series of crudely drawn pictures of nake ladies and farm animals and more a window into the soul of a tortured, drunken man.

Please post your guesses and collect your prize at Dave's shop.

What to Do With Your SSIA

Time for this weeks dictogram and I've decided that the auld dictograms need a bit of an overhaul. So instead of questioning the sexuality of my current readers I've decided to question the sexuality of former and non readers. Enjoy.