Gillette Quattro And The Great Razor Blade Scandal
I dunno about you, but I was one of those stupid kids you see on tv who, at the age of five, are discovered by their mothers in the bathroom, blood dripping from their faces and a blunt Bic plastic razor in hand. Fast forward twenty five years and this very imagined memory floated into my head as I ripped open a state of the art (if a razor counts as art today) Gillette Quattro razor blade this morning. Due to a luggage error on the side of Delta Airlines (please stay tuned for the first in my series of blogs entitled "Delta Are A Stupid Bunch Of Incompetent Cunts") I had to forsake my normal Gillette Mach 3 razor for this new space age razor that promised a closer shave than ever before.
Mach 3
Now I am sceptical about this whole Mach 3 bullshit. I'd almost go as far as to take my old friend Jim Corr's line that it's a conspiracy. If you don't know what I'm on about here's the summary....Mach 3 has 3 blades, in theory for a closer shave. We'll in my experience it's just three blades of varying degrees of bluntness that feel like a briar being dragged across your puss every morning. So I wasn't exactly overawed by the blurb on the front of the Gillette Quattro this morning. And I wasn't disappointed. You see what the great idiot public fail to realise is that you can have a hundred blades all neatly stacked on top of one another but that's just a hundred little spaces for your stubble to lodge and render the blade ineffective for subsequent shaves. I spent ten minutes banging the bloody thing off the wash handbasin this morning in order to get it clean. Talk about a pain in the hole!!
Quattro
So at the age of thirty I am now left with a shaving-cut face, a decision about going hirsute a la Gill Grisom or using a cut throat razor and the memory of when I didn't have to fucking shave!!!
Mach 3Now I am sceptical about this whole Mach 3 bullshit. I'd almost go as far as to take my old friend Jim Corr's line that it's a conspiracy. If you don't know what I'm on about here's the summary....Mach 3 has 3 blades, in theory for a closer shave. We'll in my experience it's just three blades of varying degrees of bluntness that feel like a briar being dragged across your puss every morning. So I wasn't exactly overawed by the blurb on the front of the Gillette Quattro this morning. And I wasn't disappointed. You see what the great idiot public fail to realise is that you can have a hundred blades all neatly stacked on top of one another but that's just a hundred little spaces for your stubble to lodge and render the blade ineffective for subsequent shaves. I spent ten minutes banging the bloody thing off the wash handbasin this morning in order to get it clean. Talk about a pain in the hole!!
Quattro
So at the age of thirty I am now left with a shaving-cut face, a decision about going hirsute a la Gill Grisom or using a cut throat razor and the memory of when I didn't have to fucking shave!!!
posted by Unknown at
14:44
3 Comments:
Quattro sucks. period. I'm going back to my attra- lasts 10 times longer, closer shave, and doesn't cut my face. you also have clean the quattro with a brush or beat the hell out of it against the sink after one swipe, or it clogs up- fouling the blades. overpriced piece of crap!
agree on trying to clean the razors,it is almost impossible even if you bang it 100 times won't work and the shaving sucks even the first time you use it.I am back to my track 2 old shaver that I bought 38 years ago and it does the job better than their quattro.
you are right about the quattro from gilette what a bullshit of product.Even if you bang it 100 times to clean it, it won't work so I gave gilette ") dollars as donation (that the way i feel for bying it)to fool us with a new product and i went back to my track " that I bought 40 years ago. thank you gilette for letting us feel such folls for believing you
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