Sinn Fein Make Historic Announcement

Sinn Fein have announced their first ever candidate to run on the British Mainland. This is a truly historic moment and signals an end to the armed struggle and a commitment to purely democratic means. The announcement was made last night at specially convened Ard Comhairle, the first to be held outside the thirty two counties, in Hull.

Gerry Adams announced that James Dutton will be standing in the Gobblers Knob ward of the Hull constituency in next month’s by-election. Dutton, who now wishes to be known as Seamus O’ Duttuin, has a checkered political past having at one time or another been a member of Labor, Lib Dem’s, The Tories and The Fair Play For Fatties party. O’ Duttuin said last night that he identified with the Republican struggle and listed Bobby Sands as one of his hero’s, both men having served time in The Maze prison in Belfast (at different times admittedly). While O’ Duttuin did engage in a few dirty protests in his time he could never quiet bring himself to go on hunger strike.



Gerry Adams, O' Duttuin and the Indian from The Village People


With Labor in disarray and The Tories leaderless, O’ Dutuin is thought to have a better than even chance of clinching the seat and become the first ever Sinn Fein MP to take up his seat in Westminster. Among O‘ Duttuins main policies are free lard for school children and mandatory nudity for hot women. Will he succeed, only time will tell.


Tiocfaidh Ar La, O’ Dutuin, Tiocfaidh Ar La!!!!!



O' Duttuin in a sexy black number with Martin McGuinnes